7 Things About Me That Freaked Out My Father

Hello!

Since I turned 30, I have been meditating about my late father a lot and how anything to do with me and guys and being a woman seemed to fill him with fear.

My Father was petrified of the following things:

1.) My Fertility

When I was 12 and had my first period I went into his office and sat down. He was doing paperwork and I said to him

“Daddy I had my first period!” 😀

He said said

“Mmm…” 😑

(He wasn’t paying attention)

Then he said

“And what does that mean?”

With his head still down (still not paying attention)

Then I said

“It means I can have children now!”

He stopped breathing and looked at me…

2.) My Boob’s

They budded one day and that freaked him out. I was then given 4 rules by him: 1) My boob’s must always be covered in public 2) A bra must always be worn in public. 3) The bra must fit so 4) My boob’s never jiggle in public.

Bra chart for those interested… lol

He told me that – one time – in a way that only Dad’s speak. You know what I’m talking about… They don’t yell at you but they just have a stern, non-agressive conversation with you, which tells you this is not a negotiation.

Haven’t been bra-less in public since! lol

3.) Other men on the internet

My Father did IT for the RAF (Royal Air Force) and was a Consultant for IT for investment banks from the USA to Asia. He knew his way around Windows…. Do you want to know what my Father did to my computer?

He created a secret Administrator account which he hid, that secretly had control over my entire computer and triple encrypted my machine. He made my account seem like the Administrator account but it was not.

This was done to stop me being able to contact or be contacted by males on the internet. When he passed away I had to pay my friends dad (who was an IT technician) to hack into my own computer so I could update it. That’s how I found out about the secret Administrator account!

4.) Anything with a penis

My Father didn’t like men talking to me or about me.

If they were real people Daddy wouldnt like them

He didn’t like it if his colleagues asked about me or tried talking to me. If his colleagues ever tried to talk about me he would change the conversation QUICKLYYYYYY. It was almost a bit rude the way he did it actually. He didn’t even like male relatives he don’t know very well talking to me too much, apart from my brother. He watched my interaction with men at church with his beady eyes 👀

5.) Me Kissing My Boyfriends

My Father did not like me kissing my boyfriends and activity discouraged it.

6.) Boys in my room

This is just sound parenting. Can’t fault that. You’re an idiot if you don’t mind boys in your daughter’s room.

7.) Boyfriends staying over

Hahaha! One time I got in late from a date. My boyfriend dropped me off. It was really late it was not intentional deviance. On my part….

I didn’t know it but at the time but my boyfriend at the time knew how hospitable my mother and I were so he purposely either turned up late or brought me back late. It was at a point where it was so late that out of a good will gesture I offered to let him sleep on the sofa. So he could go back home at a safer time in the morning. I was just being hospitable. My Dad however was so furious he was up all night stewing.

My Daddy’s face when my boyfriend slept on the sofa 😃

He wanted to drive something pointy through the guys heart in his sleep… 💔. My mother held him back.

Below is a gif which adequately shows the look on my father’s face as he walked out of the house to go to work the next day and my boyfriend was still there…

So to recap. Me growing up was a source of intense fear for for my father. My boobs were also an area of stress for him and he didn’t like men around me.

He also used to make me write a bullet-pointed list of where I was going to be and the phone numbers of everyone I was going to be the with…

Oh well at least he loved me! 😋 If anything I regret not listening to my father more. As someone who is berieved of a parent following his untimely passing due to cancer, I can say that good father’s are underappreciated and I really appreciate what my father was trying to teach me now. Those of you who still have father’s should appreciate their sometimes stern and overbearing behaviour because it is actually love.

Xxx

Beware Of Nice #Church #Guys |#Christianity #relationships #phd #men

Hey everyone,

Sorry my blog posts have been a bit sparse for the last two weeks, as you know I’m self employed so I, like every other self employed individual in the country, have been frantically trying to finish my Tax Return (and gathering money to pay my taxes lol) before the deadline to avoid the £100 fine! Blogging came second to that I’m sorry lol. Anyway, it’s submitted now and I can get back to blogging.

I’ve been meditating on something someone said to me a while back. “Why don’t you just find a nice guy from church?”

Well….. that’s making some pretty big assumptions, like the idea that they are all “nice” for a start:
They are only men

Christian men are just that… they are men. They have the same stupidness festering at the back of their minds that other men do, it’s just the way they deal with it is different. Or at least it’s supposed to be. Don’t expect too much from them hah hah! They have the same struggles. Any Christian guys reading this, well… whatever naughty thoughts they were ever going to have about me, trust me, they have already had them as soon as they saw I posted something on FB/Twitter/LinkedIn… In fact, it’s probably the reason why they even read my blog in the first place… regardless of whether they are in a relationship or not.

A guy could be one thing leading worship on stage and then behind closed doors he’s a gimp! Women have literally died, literally, when they just assumed that a guy was one thing because he said he was.

I’ve always said that the only difference between a Christian guy and a guy who isn’t a Christian is thus – they both want to have sex with you in the back of their car it’s just you expect the Christian guy to have the decency to marry you first… and that’s it!

The moment some exegete find any scrap of evidence that you CAN in fact have sex before marriage, they are all going to be at it like no body’s business… Do not be under any illusions, that nice church boy wants to put his penis in your daughters vagina. Yeah he’s waiting but with the end game of penetration.

The problem with being a woman is that a man who just wants a place to park his penis for the night wants to have sex with you and a man who is attracted to you, utterly loves the very ground you walk on and is completely dedicated to your personal and spiritual development is also a man who wants to have sex with you. When both kinds of men are expressing the same kind of desire towards you it can be difficult to tell which man you should be with! Some Christian guys are just getting married JUST so they can have sex with the young woman they like. I’ve heard these horror stories and they all ended in divorce unfortunately because they slept with each other, then immediately realised that all they had in their relationship was the anticipation of sex, they had sex and then relationship was done literally within a few hours of marriage. It’s sad but this is happening in the church, right now because there are guys whose motivation is not what it should be.
You cannot make assumptions about anyone’s Christianity

Not every person who says they are a Christian is a Christian. Only Jesus knows not who but WHAT is actually sitting in the pews. It says in the Bible:

(Matthew 7:21 NLT) “[21] “Not everyone who calls out to me, ‘Lord! Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter.”

Some people are just IN the church but they are not OF the church. On more than one occasion I’ve had guys, church guys, who seem soo nice and sweet at church and good, call/fb message/etc me to ask to see me naked… I’m not even joking. I wish I was, this has happened people! I’ve just stopped taking certain peoples calls/whatsapp/fb friend requests now lol. We’re not supposed to have sex or do highly intimate and sexual things before marriage! I’ve blogged about this! (follow this link for more information). I’m not saying we can’t kiss but good gracious! Stop asking! It’s not going to happen! These people are not Christians, soo many guys I’ve met and I’ve realised that they are just there (as in at church) so as not to upset their mum or their grandmother but they don’t believe it and at the first opportunity they misbehave.

Some guys they just think that it’s ok to go up to the boundary but it’s not ok to cross the boundary. The boundary is a marker of where you should not be, it’s a warning sign that you are going to the outer limits and YOU NEED TO TURN BACK! So many times guys who I thought were Christian tried to encourage me to do things with them that I should not and I’m thinking “…what’s going on?!!?? I thought you and I went to church??…”.

You have got to be careful. Only Jesus knows what is really going on in a man’s mind.
Male headship and female submission theologies make Christian men mistreat women (this bit is in my PhD)

Christianity, like mainstream European/British/American culture is patriarchal (men leading follow this link for a dictionary explanation) this mixture of religion and male headship/female submission ideals have been proven to be dangerous for women, as religion and spirituality can overtly and covertly promote abuse (Yick 2008, p.1289) and the greatest predictors of violence against women are environments that support male control and male authority over female behaviour (Heise and Kotsadam 2015, e333). As a result, the Christian environment can be predicted (and proven) to be an abusive atmosphere for women, as it is already known that Christianity is patriarchal in nature and patriarchy fosters and cultivates environments where men seek to control or abuse women (Wall 2014). Furthermore, Christian teachings can be used to enforce patriarchal marital roles, e.g. male leadership/control and female submission (Aune & Barnes 2018, p.10).

The cocktail of sexist ideas towards women and faith have been proved to be unsafe for women in churches. In a study conducted in Christian homes in North America, it was found that physical abuse rates of Christian women are similar to societal rates (Annis and Rice 2001). This was found to translate in UK churches where a study conducted in Cumbria found that when all forms of domestic abuse are included, the evidence (e.g. Wang et al. 2009) suggests that there is not a significant difference in rates of abuse when churchgoers are compared with non-churchgoers. Conservative ideas on female submission and male headship and a culture of silence were found to blame in many of these cases (Aune & Barnes 2018). Shockingly, it was also found by S. Tracey (2008) that evangelical men who sporadically attend church are more likely than men of any other religious group, even more likely than secular men, to assault their wives (Tracey 2008, p.16). Knickmeyer et al. (2010) interviewed Christian women who said their husbands used conservative Christian theological ideas of male headship and female submission as sanction to abuse them (Knickmeyer, Levitt & Horne 2010, p.102), compelling their wives to submit to their authority because they said the Bible required it. Christian teachings can also be used to pressure women to forgive too quickly or to see abuse as their “cross to bear” (Nason-Clark 2004 p.304). Interestingly, mainline protestant churches have been quicker to respond to the issue of domestic abuse than evangelicals, the most conservative of whom continue to publish marriage advice literature that ignores the problem (Aune & Barnes 2018, p.12).

The Bible, when properly translated, is egalitarian but as men are often holders of knowledge and therefore… power, they are not forthcoming with this information. This is because if the women understood that they are equal as leaders to men they would rise up, become more independent and the men would loose their ability to control them. For further reading on this topic I suggest starting with “What Paul Really Said About Women” by John Temple Bristow. I say start here because it’s not super long but is still academically rigorous – here’s the link for the book on Amazon https://www.amazon.co.uk/What-Paul-Really-about-Women/dp/0060610638.
Conclusion

If there is a Christian guy who is interested in your daughter you should exercise the same level of caution and suspicion that you would with any man. Some Christian guy’s are in fact a larger more pressing threat, more dangerous than your normal man because he appears non-threatening and “safe” so you trust him more and scrutinize him less, then happily leave him alone with your daughter, not realising that she is actually just his prey. He knows you are more willing to look away and trust him because he’s a “good church boy” and you want your daughter to be with someone “nice” and “successful”. He uses this to his advantage. However, if it has a penis it will try and find a vagina to put it in so be careful how much freedom you have with him. Everyone has a point in which they will just give in.

Arm yourselves with knowledge and stop being so gosh darn naive.

P.S. some are really nice this is not true of every Christian man you just have to pray that you found the right one and use discernment.

Catherine x

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Bibliography

Annis, W. and R. R. Rice. 2001. A Survey of Abuse Prevalence in the Christian Reformed Church. Journal of Religion and Abuse. 3:3-4, 7-40

Aune, K. & R Barnes. 2018. In Churches Too: Church Responses to Domestic Abuse – A case study of Cumbria. Coventry: Coventry University and Leicester: University of Leicester.

Heise, L. L. and A. Kotsadam. 2015. Cross-national and multilevel correlates of partner violence: an analysis of data from population-based surveys. The Lancet Global Health. 3, e332-340.

Knickmeyer, N., H. Levitt, & S. G. Horne. 2010. Putting on Sunday Best: The Silencing of Battered Women within Christian Faith Communities. Feminism & Psychology, 20:1, 94-113.

Nason-Clark, N. 2004. When Terror Strikes at Home: The Interface Between Religion and Domestic Violence. Journal for the Scientific Study of Religion, 43:3, 303-310.

Tracey, S. R. 2008. What Does “Submit In Everything” Really Mean? The Nature And Scope Of Marital Submission. TRINJ. 29, 285-312

Wall, L. 2014. ‘Gender equality and violence against women: What’s the connection?’ Australian Government, Australian Institute of Family Studies Web site, at: <https://aifs.gov.au/sites/default/files/publication-documents/ressum7.pdf&gt; 2 March 2018

Wang, M-C, S. G. Horne, H. M. Levitt & L. M. Klesges. 2009. Christian Women in IPV Relationships: An Exploratory Study of Religious Factors. Journal of Psychology and Christianity. 28:3, 224-235.

Yick, A. G. 2008. A Metasynthesis of Qualitative Findings on the Role of Spirituality and Religiosity Among Culturally Diverse Domestic Violence Survivors. Qualitative Health Research, 18:9, 1289-1306.

3 Ways The Devil Tempts #Men | #mensministry #Jesus #theology

Hey everybody,

Today I am going to talk about something that Jesus showed me when I was reading Luke the other day, how the devil tempts men in particular. Let’s look at the passage I was reading, Jesus’ words are highlighted in red, the devil in bold:

(Luke 4:1-13 NLT) “[1] Then Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan River. He was led by the Spirit in the wilderness, [2] where he was tempted by the devil for forty days. Jesus ate nothing all that time and became very hungry.

[3] Then the devil said to him, “If you are the Son of God, tell this stone to become a loaf of bread.” [4] But Jesus told him, No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone.‘”

[5] Then the devil took him up and revealed to him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time. [6] “I will give you the glory of these kingdoms and authority over them,” the devil said, “because they are mine to give to anyone I please. [7] I will give it all to you if you will worship me.” [8] Jesus replied, “The Scriptures say, ‘You must worship the LORD your God and serve only him.'”

[9] Then the devil took him to Jerusalem, to the highest point of the Temple, and said, “If you are the Son of God, jump off! [10] For the Scriptures say, ‘He will order his angels to protect and guard you. [11] And they will hold you up with their hands so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.'” [12] Jesus responded, “The Scriptures also say, ‘You must not test the LORD your God.'”

[13] When the devil had finished tempting Jesus, he left him until the next opportunity came.”

What Jesus revealed to me is that the way the devil tempts males is threefold, always along the lines of:

  1. Survival
  2. Power
  3. Recklessness

Let’s examine the scripture above once again to see:

1.) Temptation of Survival

This temptation is aimed at destabilizing the bottom two levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs- Physiological and Safety needs (follow the link to find out more).

(Luke 4:1-4 NLT) “[1] Then Jesus, full of the Holy Spirit, returned from the Jordan River. He was led by the Spirit in the wilderness, [2] where he was tempted by the devil for forty days. Jesus ate nothing all that time and became very hungry.

[3] Then the devil said to him, “If you are the Son of God, tell this stone to become a loaf of bread.” [4] But Jesus told him, No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone.‘”

Jesus was in the wilderness. Now wilderness in the Bible does not just represent a physical wilderness, forest desert etc, in this case yes it did represent a physical wilderness but it is also a metaphor for wilderness in ones life. Jesus is here showing us a metaphor of how we are to behave when faced with our own “wilderness”. Wilderness can be financial, as in lean times financially; it can also be social, maybe you don’t have any or many friends. It is basically a metaphor for any situation you find yourself in where you are vulnerable and in a place of spiritual dryness Amos 5:25 or solitude for a time of training in life Matthew 4:1.

Notice, Jesus was also hungry, He lacked basic things, in fact, He had nothing! AND THIS IS WHEN THE DEVIL MADE A MOVE, WHEN JESUS WAS VULNERABLE. The devil did not come before, when Jesus was with His friends and had just been baptised by John the Baptist and the Holy Spirit descended on Him like a dove in the previous chapter. No! The devil came when Jesus was alone and in desperate need for basic things, when His will would have been compromised due to desperation. The devil then tried to manipulate Jesus into doing something that God (the Father) did not want Jesus (God the Son) to do, with the promise of providing a quick fix, that would meet Jesus’ need sooner than God had intended. This would have been a quick fix but the long term ramifications would have been huge. Essentially, had Jesus done that then He would have disobeyed God (the Spirit) who told Jesus to fast and go into the wilderness the first place. Disobeying God would have violated the law, which would have made Jesus unrighteous, which would have meant that He was not a perfect sacrifice to fully atone for our sins, which would have meant that we would still be having to sacrifice animals and live by the Levitical laws, the Holy Spirit would not live in people but descend temporarily on people like old times and humanity would never ever ever be fully atoned to God ever, meaning there would be no salvation for anyone ever.

This is how the devil operates with men. He waits till they are vulnerable, in their wilderness, looking for a way out and a way to survive and tempts them with seemingly quick fixes that are wrong but encouraging them to self-justify their actions by giving them a lie that, they need to do this thing to survive and if they don’t do this thing they will perish. Men, how many times in your life have you been in a desperate situation and tempted to do the thing that you know is wrong just because you think, “if I don’t do this wrong thing I am going to fail”? It’s an attack. Be guarded, short term quick fixes are not always from God. It’s sometimes the devil trying to trap you and destroy everyone else around you. Adam was tempted in Genesis with a quick solution that would enhance his survival and through that everyone is now oppressed see Genesis 3. Likewise, if Jesus had given in, the whole of humanity would have been even more oppressed.

As men you need to understand the consequences of your actions and how they affect the people around you, you have to understand your privileged social status and how much power you have, not just physically but socially and economically as well. Because of your enhanced psycho-social realities, culturally men have greater social power which means that you act as gateways to not only your life but the lives of others and you aren’t taking this seriously enough. You’re just doing things to “survive” and not thinking about the long term consequences of your actions. It is the short term relief that the devil is using to hoodwink you, to draw your attention away from the long term consequences of your actions and eternity, we should be eternity minded when we make our decisions and that applies to men and women.

This kind of temptation can also be related to sex, maybe you feel like you really would like to sleep with whoever and just get short term relief so you can “survive” *rolls eyes* for a bit longer but there are long term consequences to that, especially before marriage or if the woman in question IS NOT YOURS!! Maybe you believe in “medicinal masturbation”… lol. Just to “ease the pressure on your balls” to help you “survive” *rolls eyes*, till you can get married to your fiancée/girlfriend. Don’t do that. It’s the devil setting you up to fail by trying to get you into habits that you can’t shake before you’re even married. Before you know it you’re hooked and you won’t actually be able to be stimulated by a real woman or a real vagina, you can actually condition your brain to only respond to porn. This video from this ministry is a good resource for this issue (follow the link to find out more). . It’s because of how the brain works and the reward centres in the brain see my previous article for more information about the brain (follow the link to find out more). The devil is trying to destroy your long term outlook. However, Jesus wants you to have life and life more abundantly but that requires patience. I’m still trying myself in the area of patience so I’m speaking to myself as well.

2.) Temptation of Power

This temptation is aimed at destabilizing the next two levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs- Social belonging and Esteem needs (follow the link to find out more).

(Luke 4:5-8 NLT) “[5] Then the devil took him up and revealed to him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time. [6] “I will give you the glory of these kingdoms and authority over them,” the devil said, “because they are mine to give to anyone I please. [7] I will give it all to you if you will worship me.” [8] Jesus replied, “The Scriptures say, ‘You must worship the LORD your God and serve only him.'”

Again, remember at this point Jesus is still in the wilderness and Jesus’ basic need of survival is appearing to not being met immediately. So Jesus is still in a position of vulnerability. In this position of vulnerability, the devil offers power, much more extreme and such a far cry away from what Jesus was going through. The only cost for this power is to worship the devil.

This is another way that the devil gets men in particular. The seductive lure of POWER! The devil flaunts all the joys that wealth can bring and all the amazing things one can do and have with it. The cost for this wealth is to worship the devil. That can come basically in the form of doing anything wrong, anything that can compromise your integrity but will gain you some kind of financial gain. Maybe, you’re encouraged to lie about something, maybe a relationship, your faith or even anything that will compromise your integrity, in order to gain quickly, financially. These get rich quick schemes are often traps from the devil designed to compromise you. Don’t envy people who are super rich, you have absolutely no idea how they got it.

Take the Western powers for example. The reason why Britain, America and Europe are so rich is because they had an enormous unpaid workforce, enslaved African peoples. The things they did to those people are unthinkable. One punishment the Caucasian male slave owners gave African slaves was when they tried to escape they would get one slave to poo into the mouth of the slave that tried to run away and he had to swallow it. The most attractive African women were pimped out to other male Caucasian slave owners in a part of the salve trade known as the Pretty Trade. The male Caucasian slave owners would also use any African slave that they found attractive as a concubine, just for sex, the African slaves were not allowed to refuse, so they raped them. The slaves made Britain, America and Europe so much money, that’s why the West is so rich today. It was not just African people who were enslaved, pick any country in the Common Wealth and those people were enslaved too. There were even indentured Irish slaves as well! The White people were more than happy to enslave their own people too…

Has anybody asked you to do something that you know isn’t right or you know will somehow compromise your integrity but offered to compensate you financially for it? Don’t do it, it’s a trap that men fall for all the time. That’s why we have dictators, wars and the global economic crisis due to bankers greed.

This is also related to sex. Dominating women sexually, being sexually aggressive towards women because you know they are not strong enough to push you away. It’s a power trip. Thinking rapey thought’s, it’s the devil trying to seduce you and tempt you along the lines of power. Even if she is your wife, if she doesn’t want to don’t force her, it’s still rape.

Whenever we try to upgrade our power or sphere of influence through means that are wrong we are worshipping the devil.

3.) Temptation of Recklessness

This temptation is aimed at destabilising the last two levels of Maslow’s Hierarchy Of Needs- Self Actualization and Self Transcendence (follow the link to find out more).

(Luke 4:9-12 NLT) “[9] Then the devil took him to Jerusalem, to the highest point of the Temple, and said, “If you are the Son of God, jump off! [10] For the Scriptures say, ‘He will order his angels to protect and guard you. [11] And they will hold you up with their hands so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone.'” [12] Jesus responded, “The Scriptures also say, ‘You must not test the LORD your God.'”

Again, Jesus was still in a wilderness and hungry, the devil tempted Him first by appealing to his basic needs, then he appealed to men’s desire for power, especially when they are in a state where they are in a state of reduced power or powerlessness or vulnerability of any kind, finally, the devil tried to tempt Jesus along the lines of men’s recklessness.

When we “test” God we are putting ourselves in the position of employer of God. We are saying, to God that God is accountable to us and that we are going to give God an observation (those of you reading this who work will understand what an observation is, it’s when your manager decides that they want to check that you are actually doing the job that they are paying you to do and that you are actually doing it well, so they stand there breathing down your neck watching you do it. Then you have a meeting afterwards with them/or whoever observed you, where they tell you where you could improve or what you’re doing well. It’s annoying and stressful, that’s partly why I work for myself now).

God doesn’t work for us, we work for God. God doesn’t have to prove anything to us, it’s we who have to prove ourselves to God.

This is another place where the devil attacks men. When they have that attitude that I’m going to test God’s power, it’s an insult to God. Moreover, it leads men to do stupid things, disregarding the brains that God gave humans to reason and do stupid things, where they do not take due care because they assume God is going to save them. Yes if you want to do something like jump out of a plane, make sure you pack your parachute. God is not going to save you if you jump out expecting angels to save you because it’s an appalling act of stupidity that God is not going to reward by saving you. It’s not in God’s interest because then everyone on earth would do silly things that hurt each other. That’s why God won’t save you. He won’t save you so as to teach other people not to do it. God does not want humanity to be backward.

I used to date this idiot right, when he went on holiday he wouldn’t take his phone with him. He said that I should just have faith that God would protect him and that me worrying about him was a sign of a lack of faith and that I didn’t really believe that Jesus was with him. With that attitude and all the drinking that he did when he was away, yeah, he’s right I do not believe that Jesus was with him lol. I believe that he survived his holidays on his own and that God didn’t actually have anything to do with it. It was reckless, inconsiderate of the felling of both me and his poor long-suffering mother. Disgusting jerk. That kind of thing is testing God. I didn’t want him to take his phone because I wanted to call him all the time because he used to call me all the time and I was happy for a break! I wanted him to take his phone because he was going to a place he didn’t live and it’s a sensible precaution.

Men do stupid crap all the time. Idiots. Stop it, you’re going to hurt yourselves and God is not necessarily going to save you. It’s always justified and covered by phrases like “oh well boys will be boys” etc. The devil is appealing to your idiocy, trying to make you, again, do something quick, that is going to damage you in the long run and you are thinking, don’t worry it’ll be ok God is with me but not necessarily. Certain adrenaline seeking sports, if you want to do them, wear a helmet? Or don’t do it at all. If something seems like it’s an unreasonable risk, don’t do it. If there is a likelihood that you might die doing an activity and it’s not necessary because you’re not a fireman or a policeman, think twice. Short term stupidity can lead to long term consequences and God will not facilitate, encourage or enable human stupidity, ever, especially when you are trying to use him as “staff” that will catch you, especially because letting you break your leg will mean that you have lots of time alone when you can read your bible and that scenario does suit God.

This can also be related to sex. You might think, yeah well you know, just a quickie, it might make a baby or whatever but I’m sure that God will get me out of this, let’s just test it to see what happens 😉 No!

Commonalities with the three scenarios

Notice that the three scenarios have something in common.

  1. Temptation happens in the midst of vulnerability – the devil waits till a man is in a vulnerable position when his ability to rationalize is compromised.
  2. Quick decisions for quick fixes – the devil tries to make a person make decisions quickly without thinking it through. Which is why the devil waits till a man is vulnerable, desperation and fear make you do silly things
  3. All three ways of tempting encourage men to make poor life choices when it comes to sex.
  4. The devil temps men in order to ruin everybody – when men give in to temptation, it doesn’t just affect men it affects everybody, women, children, animals, the environment, everything because, culturally, men have more power than women.

How did Jesus deal with temptation?

Jesus used The Word!

(Luke 4:4,8,12 NLT)

“…[4] But Jesus told him, No! The Scriptures say, ‘People do not live by bread alone.‘”…

[8] Jesus replied, “The Scriptures say, ‘You must worship the LORD your God and serve only him.‘” …

[12] Jesus responded, “The Scriptures also say, ‘You must not test the LORD your God.

Every time the devil tried to tempt Jesus it was to destabilise Jesus’ motivation away from being satisfied by and through God and towards being satisfied by the devil, by encouraging Jesus to selfishly satisfy His needs through Himself, when and how the devil made it seem attractive. Jesus rebuffed these temptations by responding to the devil with The Word, that is the words of the Bible. Jesus was able to do this because He knew the scriptures. That comes from READING THE BIBLE EVERY DAY. Jesus came to fulfil the Law. This was outlined in Exodus, detailed in Leviticus, Further expounded and acted upon in Numbers and repeated in Deuteronomy. One of the laws was the following:

(Deuteronomy 6:6-9 NLT) “[6] And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. [7] Repeat them again and again to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. [8] Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. [9] Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

Which was reiterated to Joshua later on:

(Joshua 1:8 NLT) “[8] Study this Book of Instruction continually. Meditate on it day and night so you will be sure to obey everything written in it. Only then will you prosper and succeed in all you do.”

We are supposed to read the Bible daily and read it to our children and remind ourselves of it, that way you get to know it off your head, so when temptation comes you can recollect what God says to do. So when the devil attack your mind you can respond with The Word and use The Word to inform your actions, especially when you are to emotionally compromised to think straight.

MEN, LIFE IS AN OPEN BOOK EXAM, YOU ARE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO IT ON YOUR OWN. YOU HAVE THE ANSWERS IN THE BIBLE. When you don’t read your Bible gentlemen, it’s the equivalent of doing a calculator Maths exam without ever picking up your calculator and just leaving it on the desk…

Final Warning

(Luke 4:13 NLT) “[13] When the devil had finished tempting Jesus, he left him until the next opportunity came.”

Temptation did not stop for Jesus, the temptation that we saw early on in the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) is just the only time that any kind of tempting of Jesus was written down. From what we can see from the above verse is that Jesus was tempted constantly like the rest of us. The only difference is that Jesus did not give in because Jesus knew and used The Word!

Where’s your Bible dude?…

I keep mine on me in the form of an app on my phone, it’s just a practical way to do things. Hope that made you think.

Catherine x

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I got a #new jumper dress! 🙂 #fashion

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Why I think being a modern man is difficult

Helloo,

I’ve been thinking about men and the things they struggle with. Read to the bottom I’ve attached a documentary by CNN on the topic, veerrrrrry interesting.

Life is hard when you’re a man. I live in Britain, so I can only speak about the typical Anglo-American male. Let’s scrutinize their lives together lol. For those of you who don’t know who that is it’s just a male that resides in either England (Anglo) or America, who adopts the English and or American cultural practices of manhood, usually but not exclusively, Caucasian.
The typical Anglo-American male is emotionally stifled. You are taught to internalize your emotions and to barely even recognize them and not vent in a healthy way. Then something that should have been dealt with or even dare I say cried about eventually just comes out as rage.
You don’t know how feminist you should be. Sometimes men offer their seats to women just to be gentlemanly and they get called out for it because the woman thinks that it is not a man’s place to do that just because she is a woman, she can stand on her own two feet. I’m personally not like that but I understand what the women mean by it.
You are bombarded by unobtainable standards of manhood. Having the right job, Earning the right amount of money. Having the perfect body with chiselled abs. Having your own place. Having your own children who are perfect. A wife who is perfect. A car that is perfect etc. Not everybody is going to be rich, or married or have perfect children.
Traditional gender roles have been blurred and you find this confusing and scary. Now this one is very interesting. With the increase in opportunities and education for women a woman can now do everything a man can. However, this presents itself with a problem in that it forces men to confront their place in society. This is because women’s role in marriage/society is also linked to their biology, only women can carry and give birth to children, so their traditional role as caregivers are justified and tied up in their biology. Men, however, cannot carry young nor can they breastfeed, so traditionally they went out to work and brought the dollar home but now women can do that too. BUTTTT women can encroach upon men”s traditional roles but men cannot encroach upon women’s traditional roles because their biology prohibits it, what I mean is that a man cannot carry or give birth to young or breastfeed etc. Which has your typical Anglo-American male thinking:

“…right so carrying the young for 9 months she can do that but I can’t and breastfeeding and giving birth she can do that but I can’t but it’s ok I can be useful other ways! Errm… ok so bringing in the money riiiight well she can do that as well, going out to work paying the bills ok yeah soooo she can do that too, driving the car, getting educated etc she can do that as wellll, so what exactly is my unique usefulness in society? She can not only do the things that men CAN’T DO but she can ALSO do the things that MEN CAN DO. What am I here for?…Sperm donor?”

Now I’m going to suggest something radical…. I think that men’s role in life is to love Jesus and nurture just like women nurture. I think men should be the opposite of what they are traditionally, stern, money bags, in charge, I think they should be in touch with their emotions and work in order to nurture and pick up the slack to help, not hold that over the women and just to be in charge. If the two sexes were to work together not against each other it would be so much more helpful. I think that encouraging equal opportunities for women is a big part of the nurturing role of men towards society as a whole. They have the social capital to do soo much good and they either waste it or abuse it. According to the 2017 Global Gender Gap Report, published by the World Economic Forum, which benchmarks 144 countries on their progress towards gender parity across four matrices: Economic Participation and Opportunity, Educational Attainment, Health and Survival and Political Empowerment, it will take 217 years for women to achieve parity with men globally. The report states that this is partly due to the widening of the Economic Participation gap, which has reverted back to where it stood in 2008. One key finding of the report is that Western Europe is reported to have a remaining gender gap of 25%, putting that area ahead of North America, which has a remaining gender gap of 28%. The report also goes on to state that a variety of models and empirical studies have suggested that improving gender parity could add an estimated US$250 billion to the GDP of the United Kingdom. One key avenue highlighted for further progress is closing the occupational gender gaps, which the report suggest require adjustments within the education sector, companies and by policy makers, pointing out that fields that, such as the care economy and the emerging technology sector, are losing out on the benefits of diversity (Word Economic Forum 2017, pp.vii-viii)
Some statistics on women’s leadership potential: I don’t want to exhaust you with stats so here’s the highlights:

  • Nordea Bank surveyed nearly 11,000 publicly traded companies over 8 years and found that on average companies with a female CEO or head of the board of directors had a 25% annualised return since 2009 more than double the 11% delivered by the MSCI World Index (Nordea Bank 2017)
  • A Credit Suisse report mapped 27,000 senior managers at over 3000 of the largest companies globally found that greater representation of women in senior leadership roles was linked to excess stock market returns and senior corporate profitability (Credit Suisse 2016)
  • Again, The Credit Suisse Research Institute in 2012 found that companies with women on their boards perform better than companies with all-male boards in challenging markets. Following the 2008 global economic crisis, for example, net income growth for companies with women on their boards averaged 14%, compared with 10% for companies with all-male boards (Credit Suisse 2012).
  • Lastly, a report in 2015, by the McKinsey Global Institute, who, for 95 countries, mapped 15 gender equality indicators, which fall into four categories: Equality In Work, Essential Services and Enablers of Economic Opportunity, Legal Protection and Political Voice and Physical Security and Autonomy, estimated that if a “full potential” scenario, where women participate in the economy identically to men, were realised this could add up to $28 trillion to annual global GDP in 2025. This impact would be roughly equivalent to the size of the combined US and Chinese economies. MGI also established a strong link between egalitarian societies, their attitudes and beliefs about the role of women and gender equality in work. Additionally, just like the 2017 Global Gender Gap Report (2017), published by the World Economic Forum, the McKinsey Global Institute report found that the most progress was needed in the technology and care industries and that the private sector, education sector, governments and NGO’s will need to change in order to bring about gender equality (McKinsey & Company 2015, p.ii). This report also highlights that women are half of the world’s working-age population but only generate 37% of GDP, they are also disproportionately represented in lower-productivity sectors and insufficiently represented in higher-productivity sectors (McKinsey & Company 2015, p.4). Additionally, the report highlights that 75% of the worlds total unpaid work such as: child care, caring for the elderly, cooking and cleaning is done by women, estimating that the unpaid work being undertaken by women today amounts to as much as $10 trillion of output per year, which is roughly equivalent to 13% of global GDP (McKinsey & Company 2015, p.2).

Patriarchy is not in men’s interest, women are primary caregivers due to our capacity to feed, birth and bear young. Men should be protecting and supporting women because they help to protect and support the world, given the same opportunities as men, as the afore mentioned stats show. Women often work in care industries such as teaching, nursing, care-workers, social workers etc. You don’t want somebody who can’t read or write or is unfulfilled or underpaid to be raising the most precious thing the world has, our children, if the women are not encouraged to be strong and educated or supported adequately during and after their pregnancies they will not be equipped to lead and nurture the next generation (which statistics show that they lead and nurture anyway). YOU CAN’T GIVE OUT WHAT YOU DON’T HAVE… We all benefit in the end from the children when they grow up.

Below is a documentary by CNN, you can follow this link to watch it or use the embedded player below:

Don’t forget the song I wrote 2 weeks ago 🙂

Love

Catherine x

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#wedding #lols #party

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Bibliography

CNN, ‘The Feminist on Cellblock Y’ CNN Web site, at: <https://edition.cnn.com/videos/us/2018/04/18/the-feminist-on-cellblock-y-doc-orig.cnn&gt; 10 May 2018

Credit Suisse Research Institute. 2012. Gender Diversity and Corporate Performance. August. Zurich.

Credit Suisse, ‘The CS Gender 3000: The Reward for Change 2016’ Credit Suisse Web site, at: <http://publications.credit-suisse.com/tasks/render/file/index.cfm?fileid=5A7755E1-EFDD-1973-A0B5C54AFF3FB0AE&gt; 2 March 2018

McKinsey & Company, ‘The Power of Parity: How Advancing Women’s Equality Can Add $12 Trillian To Global Growth September 2015 Executive Summary’ McKinset & Company Web site, at: <https://www.mckinsey.com/~/media/McKinsey/Global%20Themes/Employment%20and%20Growth/How%20advancing%20womens%20equality%20can%20add%2012%20trillion%20to%20global%20growth/MGI%20Power%20of%20parity_Executive%20summary_September%202015.ashx&gt; 8 March 2018

Nordea Bank, ‘Investing in female CEO’s pays off, 2017’ Nordea Bank Web site, at <https://www.nordea.com/en/press-and-news/news-and-press-releases/news-en/2017/investing-in-female-ceos-pays-off.html&gt; 2 March 2018

World Economic Forum, ‘The Global Gender Gap Report 2017, World Economic Forum Web site, at: <http://www3.weforum.org/docs/WEF_GGGR_2017.pdf&gt; 8 March 2018